What is today's color?

My mood swings a lot recently...

On a blue day - i woke up feeling very depress and almost bought an air ticket back to Malaysia.
On a green day - i woke up feeling positive and hopeful that i will get a job before my deadline and i can see my future in oz land. I am convinced!
On a red day - i woke up not wanting to do anything. Feeling sick of browsing jobs and applying them.
On another purple day - i wouldn't even want to get up from my bed.
And yet on another dunno what color of the day - i feel extremely worried...worried of current day, tomorrow and the day after tomorrow.
I have been warned by a friend of mine...watch out the mood swings....its a depression symptom. Am I having depression? Happy go lucky person like me can get depression? I guess not...just moody perhaps....I still get excited when i think of traveling around the world.

Last night, I dreamt that i've killed someone, dunno who and not sure what was the killing motif. I could only recall I was panic, whether to confess my sin or think of ways to hide it. I was in extreme regrets! Before i can think further or decide anything....i dreamt that it was a dream. Dreaming in a dream!

Deadline set!

It's been decided and I've set the 'U-turn' period to Dec10/Jan11...
I will still continue to what I'm doing daily and try by best...
Will now leave it to fate to decide where I belong to...

God's way or Fruit's way? Will these 2 lead to the same destiny??

Just couldn't let go...

I came to realize today that I'm a person who is such difficult to let go my own pride..
Seriously I tried...but I failed...
I just can't today~~

2 months

Ok, it's my 2 months 'anniversary' down under.
I am still jobless and I have been told to consider studying here.
MBA perhaps? But it's going to cost a lot...coz I havent got my PR-ship.
If money not the issue, then my biggest concern will be whether I am able to hit the books once more...
Doing MBA may or may not help in pursuing PR coz I am still required to work min. 12 months full time for my PR...

I've been asked - What is your goal? What you want out of your life?
Short term goal - I want to make money! Lotsa money coz i am so broke now...
Long term? I am not sure now....whether down under is the place I want to be. I am very sure I am less happy here now but I've also been constantly reminded that this is just transition and the days ahead going to be so much better! Is it? I am not 100% convinced though...

Think Fruit...THINK!

I've turned 32 this year...

How I wish I am just 23!
Okay...back to reality.
Came to my surprise, I dont have any special feelings on my birthday. I only need to remember that my housemate cooked me Bak Kut Teh which I've been craving for since the first day I'm here! Thanks Mr. Lim :)

Birthday wish remain unchanged since donkey years back but i do have an additional one this year...which is to get a job!

An interesting conversation on Day 2

My dad gave me 3 interesting options or rather plans...

1. If things work well and I'm lucky enough to get a job quick and settle down. I will get my PR as planned. And i will likely spend the rest of my life in Oz land...this is ideal scenario..

2. If things didnt work to well....go and take up a course or MBA. At least i will go back not empty handed. Of coz in this scenario, PR is out of the question...

3. A message from my mum - go and find a man in Oz, come back with a man...

Of all, i think option 3 is the toughest of all...hahaha. Isn't my parents cool? :P

Btw...am down due to sore throat and fever....bear was saying, at Tibet & M'sia, you were strong like a cow....how come now so weak? I guess the answer is that i've been missing my family & friends dearly....and also, i have no fresh air here in my room!

The day from tomorrow onwards

Monday - Friday working day alarm set in my mobile is now off-ed...
There's no way i can predict when i will be able to get back to an OFFICE...
Me jobless tomorrow (1/7/2010)onwards....

Mixed feelings~

Hi people! If you've been wondering whether the Fruit is still alive? Yes, she is and doing good! :)

On April Fool day, the Fruit played a fool - tendered her resignation.
Why? This is to make way to an exciting yet mind boggling Down Under Adventure.

When? Soon...4 months from today!

Realised that you'll have a heavy heart if you're flying on a one way ticket....
Cross road, mixed feelings...

Dunno what to expect and how to start...
Mean time - zzZzzzzzz first

unknown

The day after tomorrow.....is results day.....
What would it be??
Something i've expected or otherwise??
No one knows......
Time will tell.....